Refuge for a Single Mom

How often do you hear `thank you`?

I don`t hear it very often.  It seems like I do so much for other people and don`t get very much appreciation at all.  Sometimes this really gets to me – like today!

I don`t know about you, but I find myself often faced with the decision of leaving a group or place because I feel more like a doormat than a member.  I love, hug, pray or lend an ear, but I never get much in return.  It would seem like there is never anyone there for me.

This is always a huge dilemma for me.  I try to have a heart to give and a mind to care and especially a spirit full of the love of God.  As human beings, this is really tough.  We want to be loved and cared for too!  We yearn for fellowship and people that miss us when we are away!  Unfortunately, the enemy is always there to lend a hand.  Reminding us how alone we feel or how we don`t `fit in` or that we`re `left out` all the time!

Fortunately, sitting here ranting about this does make me think of a few people in my life that do thank me, miss me or just all around care and that is comforting.  In fact, it lends to that saying about quality and NOT quantity!  Or perhaps, the one about not being able to please all of the people all of the time?

So then, if people are thankless, rude, thoughtless, inconsiderate, etc., should we remove them from our lives?  Should we discontinue a work that we feel called to do?  How much do we really have to bear before we can `call it quits` on something (or someone)?

This particular verse comes to mind (and is one of my favorites):

Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.  Proverbs 31:31

You know, this would imply that our true rewards aren`t even here on Earth!  Yes, surely God will bless His daughters and provide generously for them.  We will receive our true praise and appreciation from the Lord.

Our pastor has been discussing this a lot lately, in part because of some issues at church, but mostly because it is Godly to give and not worry so much about the receiving end!

And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.  I Corinthians 13:3

Everything we do, we need to do for, through, about, because of, and with God.  Plain and simple!  If we do anything, including give, with the intention of receiving gratitude, appreciation or recognition from other human beings, our efforts are futile!  We may receive those things in the long run, but primarily, before all else, we have to live in a way pleasing to God.  A way which glorifies Him.

1 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children;
2 and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.
3 But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints;
4 and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.
5 For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.
6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.
7 Therefore do not be partakers with them;
8 for you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light
9 (for the fruit of the Light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth),
10 trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord.
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even expose them;
12 for it is disgraceful even to speak of the things which are done by them in secret.
13 But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.
14 For this reason it says, “Awake, sleeper, And arise from the dead, And Christ will shine on you.”  
15 Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise,
16 making the most of your time, because the days are evil.
17 So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit,
19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord;
20 always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father;
21 and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.  Ephesians 5:11

Labels: Decisions, Discouraged, Generosity, Godliness, Perseverance, Righteousness, Way of Thinking

In light of recent events, just within my son`s school district, I wanted to reflect a bit about fear and what the Word says about it.

Just this week, there have been at least 2 bomb threats and 1 shooting threat - within a 25 mile radius!  As I write this, my son is at school under `lock down`.  I only know this because my ex-husband was kind enough to call and inform me!  The school however, does not tell us what in the world is going on!  Rumors and assumptions fly all over the place!  What is a parent to do?

Well, for now, I`m not even going to vent or complain about my views on this for a few reasons!  1) I`m currently attempting to overcome the complaining `addiction` (see previous post) and 2) After several situations, like this, this year, I`m learning to `let go & let God`!  (Both are equally as challenging!)

`Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.`  Isaiah 41:10

It is times like these that I have to rest securely in my faith - in my God!  He is bigger and more powerful than anything that comes against my son or anyone in my family!  I have to believe that whatever the outcome, whether it be intended for good or evil, my God will use it for His glory!

11 But let all who take refuge in You be glad, Let them ever sing for joy; And may You shelter them, That those who love Your name may exult in You.
12 For it is You who blesses the righteous man, O LORD, You surround him with favor as with a shield.  Psalm 5:11-12

I mean, I would just crumble if anything happened to one of my kids!  But I have found myself worrying to the point of physical illness!  Enough already!

God promises to protect us!  He promises to have our best interest at heart!  Granted, evil rules this world and it is made more and more obvious to us with each and every terrorist attack and school massacre!

Keep me, O LORD, from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from the violent man; who have purposed to overthrow my goings.  Psalm 140:4

But, for those of us who choose to believe in God`s Word, in His promises – we can have hope and faith in better things!

1 Hear my voice, O God, in my prayer: preserve my life from fear of the enemy.
2 Hide me from the secret counsel of the wicked; from the insurrection of the workers of iniquity:
3 Who whet their tongue like a sword, and bend their bows to shoot their arrows, even bitter words:
4 That they may shoot in secret at the perfect: suddenly do they shoot at him, and fear not.
5 They encourage themselves in an evil matter: they commune of laying snares privily; they say, Who shall see them?
6 They search out iniquities; they accomplish a diligent search: both the inward thought of every one of them, and the heart, is deep.
7 But God shall shoot at them with an arrow; suddenly shall they be wounded.
8 So they shall make their own tongue to fall upon themselves: all that see them shall flee away.
9 And all men shall fear, and shall declare the work of God; for they shall wisely consider of his doing.
10 The righteous shall be glad in the LORD, and shall trust in him; and all the upright in heart shall glory.  Psalm 64:1-10

Labels: Adversity, Believe, Choices, Decisions, Determination, Perseverance, Way of Thinking

What an endearing thought – right?

Well, evidently, there`s an initiative going on to achieve just that!  Could YOU do it?  Well, I`m about to try and I`m taking my friends and fellow bloggers with me! *smile*

For the next 21 days (or as soon as my bracelet arrives) I will be attempting to NOT complain!  -About anything!  Holy Cow!!!

Scientists say it takes 21 days to break a habit and create a new one.  Whew!


Here`s what you need to do to get started:

1. Click here to order a free purple Complaint Free bracelet.

2. Tag at least 3 people and spread the word. Challenge them to participate.

3. The final step, and most important. STOP COMPLAINING! You put your bracelet on and any time you catch yourself complaining you must switch it to the opposite wrist. The goal is to go 21 days without switching it. If you switch it, your 21 days starts all over again.


7 Because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me—to keep me from exalting myself!
8 Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me.
9 And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
10 Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ`s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.  II Corinthians 12:9


I`ve tagged Alicia, Heather, Shera  Have fun with it & Good Luck!!!

Labels: Choices, Decisions, Learning, Positive Thinking, Way of Thinking

So, we`ve talked about forgiving and being loyal, passing tests and surviving trials. Those are conscious choices we make. Tough ones too!

When adversity rears its ugly head, what do we do? Well, personally, I used to go back to bed! *smile* Seriously! Things were so bad at one time, that after I got my son to school, I crawled my behind right back into bed and stayed there until he got home at 4:00! A strenuous day included watching `Judging Amy` and `Law and Order` back-to-back-to-back!

Conquering adversity is a conscious decision we make to push on! He hath said in his heart, I shall not be moved: for I shall never be in adversity. Psalm 10:16

It says NEVER girls! Never be IN adversity! It may come! It may be nasty! But you don`t have to stay there! You can consciously and willfully choose to overcome it!

What conscious decisions are you making? Well, thank God, I now get up at 6:00 am and I`m awake AND working until Midnight! -The same day! I barely watch any TV, unless it`s `Blue`s Clues`, `Backyardigans` or `Spongebob Squarepants`! I now chase after a 3 1/2 year old pre-schooler, run my own home business and run my household!

I decided, chose, willed, and PRAYED A LOT to persevere! I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities Psalm 31:7

Our Savior knows our hearts and souls! He knows our pain and suffering and mostly, He feels it! He wants nothing more than to comfort us and bring us through whatever it is that we face! Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.II Corinthians 1:4

Trust in Him! He is the only one that is there for us ALL the time and EVERY time! If you don`t believe me, say a prayer around 2:00 am! He`s listening! *wink*

Love, Hugs and Prayers to my Sisters! Have a Great Weekend!

Labels: Adversity, Choices, Comfort, Decisions